Being a parent can mean that sleep becomes a rare treat – something that we long for ourselves and desperately hope for our children. But what is a ‘good night’s sleep’ for children, and why is it so important?
THE IMPORTANCE OF SLEEP
Sleep is essential for children’s physical, emotional and cognitive development. It is no coincidence that things often feel better after a good night’s rest, because during sleep our brains process the events of the day, consolidate memories and solve problems. Physical growth is also dependent on sleep due to growth hormones primarily being secreted during deep sleep. Emotionally, sleep plays a vital role in mood regulation.
HOW MUCH SLEEP?
The amount of sleep a child needs varies by age and, while each child is unique, there are general guidelines. According to the NHS:
- Newborn babies: Daily sleep varies from eight hours up to 18 hours, but it is normal for your baby to wake during the night.
- Three to six months old: Your growing baby will need fewer night feeds and some will sleep for eight hours or more at night. By four months, they may be spending around twice as long sleeping at night as they do during the day.
- Six to 12 months old: Night feeds may no longer be necessary and some babies will sleep for up to 12 hours at night. But teething may wake them.
- One-year-olds: Around 12 to 15 hours, including daytime naps.
- Two-year-olds: Eleven to 12 hours’ sleep at night, with one or two naps during the day.
- Three- to four-year-olds: Around 12 hours of sleep, but this can range from eight hours up to 14. Many will have dropped their daytime nap.
COMMON CHALLENGES
It is not just about quantity, the quality of sleep matters too. All babies change their sleep patterns, often when you have just relaxed and congratulated yourself on getting bedtime sorted. Growth spurts, teething, illness and other issues can all have an effect.
Bedtime resistance
Children often begin testing boundaries as they develop more independence, including those around bedtime. Establishing a predictable bedtime routine and being firm about it can help. Children find comfort in routines.
Night waking is normal. However, frequent waking is exhausting for everyone. Address this by helping your child to self-soothe. Instead of rushing in at the first whimper, give them a few moments to settle themselves back to sleep. If they need your assistance, offer comfort without picking them up or turning on bright lights, because this can disrupt their sleep cycle further.
Bad dreams
Vivid dreams can cause distress, so it is important to offer comfort and reassurance. Night terrors are different. These often happen in the first few hours of sleep during the non-REM phase. Your child may scream, thrash or appear terrified but be completely unaware of your presence. While it can be alarming, it is best to avoid waking them and simply ensure they are safe. Most children grow out of this.
Separation anxiety
It is common for young children to experience separation anxiety, especially at bedtime. They might call for you repeatedly or want you to stay until they fall asleep. One strategy is to gradually reduce the time you spend in the room after tucking them in. Sit by the door rather than the bed, offer verbal reassurances and slowly leave the room while they are still awake.
Environment
Too much light, noise and other distractions such as toys can stop a child from settling, so try to keep their bedroom at a comfortable temperature (around 18-24°C), dark and quiet. If needed, you can use blackout curtains, a white-noise machine or a fan.
Most of these issues are normal as your child grows and enters different phases, but if you continue to have problems or need further advice then speak to your child’s key person or health visitor.
BEDTIME ROUTINE
One of the best things you can do to support sleep is to establish a consistent bedtime routine:
When it is approaching bedtime, make the home environment calm by stopping any rough and tumble games, and turning off loud music and screens.
Wind down with a calm activity such as a game, drawing, wash or bath time, followed by cleaning teeth and putting on their nightwear.
Snuggle up and share a picturebook.
Dim or turn off the lights before having a last cuddle or kiss.
