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A parent's guide to taking control

Routines and boundaries help young children to feel secure and to make sense of their world. The world would seem a bewildering place if anything could happen at any time or if the same behaviour elicited different responses at different times. Knowing what to expect and what is expected of them is reassuring. Children sense at some level that they are vulnerable and to feel safe they need to know that you, the adults, are in control. How much routine should I have for my child?

How much routine should I have for my child?

Routines are important, but too much structure or too rigid a routine can be stifling, leaving no free time or no possibility of responding spontaneously to events. Too relaxed a routine, that changes too readily, however, can leave a child confused and anxious. So too can a situation where there is some inconsistency between a child's main carers.

Establishing a suitable routine need not involve rigid clock-watching, but the essentials of the day need to be considered. Planning for meals, rest, activity, family time and sleep within each day will provide the necessary structure. Within this, more specific routines can be set. A predictable and enjoyable bedtime routine, for example, will help children to settle down to sleep.

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