In terms of physical growth, this is obvious. No one would suggest stretching children on a rack to make them grow more quickly. But psychological growth happens out of sight. Children's emotional, social and cognitive growth isn't so obvious. The only gauge of their maturity is their outward behaviour, and this is often misleading.
All children want to seem grown-up, so they copy adult actions and language even if they don't really understand it. Today's children are quick to pick up streetwise behaviour and catchphrases that make them appear old beyond their years.
Most parents like the idea that their children's minds are maturing faster. 'Kids today grow up so quickly,' we say, proud of our offspring's apparent sophistication. But genuine emotional resilience and social competence are not so quickly won. They develop gradually through confidence in dealing with the real world and real-life relationships with family and friends. Today's children may look and act big, but often are extremely fragile inside.
Our tests-and-targets education system adds to this 'too much too soon' mentality. To politicians it seems a good idea to push children to achieve more when they're young, so they get a 'head start' on children in other countries. In fact, concentrating on cognitive development at the expense of other aspects of psychological growth can be deeply damaging in the long run.
Extract from Detoxing Childhood: What parents need to know to raise happy, successful children (£9.99, Orion Books, ISBN 978-0-7528-9010-4).
