Dinky-Jay's new silver lacquered Petite Femme Zero Boutique boots are wobbly and the nursery floor is uneven. Zak's vision is obscured by an explosion of gelled hair spiking from his brow - but don't they look great!
'No harm children looking good and taking an interest in themselves. Nothing wrong with being smart - eh?'
Dinky-Jay isn't saying much because she has stuffed her shredded comfort blanket into her mouth and Zak has a penchant for his blue dummy.
Seen it? Been there? Children dressed as pop stars. Dad and his lad and big sister clones. This isn't an image of childhood that I enjoy, but is it any worse than the pseudo-secondary school curriculum imposed upon primary school and now babyhood itself? I don't think it is.
We are doing the same thing to the processes of early years learning.
Bernard Ashley stated, 'The notion of child development has all but disappeared from our pedagogy - as if, in curriculum terms, a six-year-old is simply a 16-year-old who has not lived quite so long.'
I find curriculums for babes - school at four, testing at five and limp word lists to take home - equally objectionable.
Oh dear! Dinky-Jay has just slipped on her frills and upset the fish tank.
Ban fish tanks.
Sue the school.
I'm sure she wasn't being supervised properly and, of course, the dress will have to be replaced...
* Peter Dixon is the author of Let Me Be (ISBN 1-873195-12-5, 7.50 inc p&p, 01962 854607)
