Imagine a situation where a small child is crying. His friend sees this, appears to be upset by the situation and cries himself. After a while the second child lashes out at the first. Is this aggressive behaviour? Is it anti-social behaviour? Is the child a potential bully? Or is the child feeling the hurt of the first child and doing the only thing he can think of to end his friend's misery?
He has shown empathy for his classmate but is not able to cope with these feelings. Hence he uses the only approach he can think of to alleviate the crying which is linked to his friend's suffering.
Empathy is one individual's ability to metaphorically step into the shoes of another and feel what it is like from their perspective. Recent studies have shown that a lack of empathy has been linked to an increase in aggressive and anti-social behaviour in children (Goudena et al, 2005).
Empathy is a skill that adults often expect young children to be able to grasp, yet it involves a range of skills that they need first to develop and explore.
How can a child understand how another child feels if they do not understand how they themselves are feeling? Even when children have the opportunities to explore and identify their own feelings, they still need a chance to build coping strategies and learn how to deal with these newly identified emotions. Practitioners must find ways of helping children to develop their emotional intelligence.
A member of the group
For many years educators have used dolls, puppets and toys to explore emotional issues. Persona dolls are also established as good practice when exploring contentious issues such as bullying and anti-discriminatory practices. Now, soft-bodied empathy dolls are being used to combine the two approaches and help very young children to explore a range of everyday emotions.
Like persona dolls, they have an established 'story' which builds over time, but empathy dolls become a permanent member of the group, rather than visit and then leave. The dolls experience the array of activities and situations facing the children each day. We learn what the dolls' favourite foods are, how many brothers or sisters they have and why, for example, they don't like green food!
Children soon take the dolls to heart. It is at this point that they become an invaluable tool for helping children to identify, understand and cope with their own feelings.
Everyday events, from the excitement of an impending birthday, to the worry of visiting the hairdresser, evoke a host of emotions in young children.
Children need a chance to discuss and explore these emotions without feeling under direct scrutiny. Empathy dolls are ideal for this.
No more labels
During the past four years I have seen empathy dolls take part in school trips and fundraising and even visit the Olympics. I have seen them help children identify sadness at the loss of a pet and celebrate joy at the birth of a new sibling. I have seen them help children to develop emotional awareness and empathy for others, and help adults to gain a deeper empathy for the children in their care.
Maybe we should be a little less willing to label children as naughty, aggressive or any of the other banner- waving titles, and take a little more time to help them work out their own feelings. A child who is able to understand and cope with their own feelings is surely more likely to be able to understand the impact of their actions on another and so will not engage in anti-social behaviours against their peers.
References
* 'Empathy in boys with disruptive behaviour disorders' (2005), P Goudena, W Matthys and M de Wied, Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, vol.
46, issue 8, p867, Blackwell Synergy Further information www.earlyideas.co.uk
CASE STUDY: CLEVELAND UNIT, MIDDLESBROUGH
Nursery staff at this child development centre and assessment nursery wanted to adopt an approach that would enable them to explore, support and reflect the diversity of the children with special needs in their care.
Headteacher Liz Pickard felt that empathy dolls offered the setting a way to support the children's emotional development within the scope of their everyday learning experiences. She says, 'All staff were motivated and engaged immediately with the dolls. They are now regarded as six new members of our nursery. They are all very different with different histories, backgrounds and needs. As our project develops, the empathy dolls will develop. The children are beginning a wonderful journey of developing social interaction, emotional intelligence and ultimately the ability to empathise with others.'
